Well the Rugby League World Cup has come and gone, and one of this blog's biggest fans, The Mayor of Mac Fields, his honourableness the great Crackmeister, has written in to convey his great disappointment that Chov did not rant on the tournament.
It's not that I don't do requests.
My response is largely summed up by the fact that it would be akin to taking candy from a baby, or suggesting Australian Idol isn't really a great way to identify talent.
That is, somewhat redundant.
But what inspired me was today's story that Ricky Stuart got fired up at the refereeing and suggested the Australian team was "stitched up" in the Final.
I love a good conspiracy theory, because they combine two things I love most about the world - morons and things morons say.
That, and the fact that good conspiracy theories don't get obscured by silly little details, like FACTS for instance.
What I would like to understand is how this conspiracy theory managed to arrange the following events during the match:
1. Darren "When I'm Drunk The Bouncer Looks Like A Tackle Bag To Me" Lockyer dropping the ball before grounding it for a try.
2. Billy "Stampy" Slater throwing the official Dumbest Pass of the Tournament and
3. Joel "Bubbler" Monaghan coat-hangering a Kiwi chasing the ball through.
I mean, you can say the penalty try decision was a "stitch-up", why make a conspicuous decision like that when it isn't necessary - weren't the Kiwis in front anyway? If you really wanted to stitch up a league game, I would suggest the easiest way to do it would be to give a team momentum in the way you police the ruck and the 10 metre-rule....very easy to give one team a leg-up and keep the other down that way. And it's not even obvious.
No, I'm afraid it's just a sook from Stick.
And I'm really hurt, because this blog has previously confessed a man-crush on Sticky, just because he is (like this blog) an angry angry man. And we need to stick together in these trying times, when we are an endangered species.
But he is talking out of his turd-tunnel on this one.
And so is John Kosmina.
Sydney FC are playing like planks and spending more time sooking than toughening up and it shows.
Also, they must be really pleased they spent all that money on John Aloisi. Big return so far.
And finally, Chov is branching out into a new realm - coming soon....a music review, one 10 years in the making!
Yes, it's true, Axl Rose finally released "Chinese Democracy". Build an Ark! (No, don't ask me how long a "cubit" is...)
Chov will listen, as a service to you dear readers, and report back soon.
And a big shout out to Maca "Purple Plums" McDonald....once he was known as El Maco Pudendo Magnifico - now he is just known as ol' Split Sack. But we love him and hope he recovers soon - who knew an impersonation of Buster Gonad from VIZ could go so horribly wrong??!